Wednesday, 17 March 2010
Never Thought I'd Say This...
... but I would rather teach junior high than kindergarten. Who knew? I had a truly horrifying day in a kindergarten classroom on Monday and I shall not be returning. Ever. In fact, I might have to turn down jobs for first grade classrooms as well. I just can't babysit 25 - 5 year olds at the same time for an entire day. Tomorrow I get to spend half the day as an elementary school music teacher. I got a shot at this last week. It's not my fav but it's better than having the tiny kiddos all day long : )
Monday, 8 March 2010
Keep Moving Forward.
Good morning. I haven't blogged in a while and figured this was as good a time as any. I'm currently substitute teaching in a high school social studies classroom. The students are watching a film called The Atomic Cafe. I've seen it before and I don't much like watching the images of the damage created by the nuclear bombs so I'm trying to block it out. I'm glad that I got called this morning to work because the pay is quite nice but... I'm feeling a little complainy about it at the same time. It's hard to get your day started right when you get a wake up call at 6:20am saying you need to be at work in exactly 25 minutes especially when you were sleeping quite nicely and had absolutely no intention of working today. Sigh. I seriously took a 30second shower (it may have been less), got dressed, dried my hair (most of the way), brushed my teeth, grabbed my laptop and dashed out the door. Of course, I was greeted by an icy windshield -- blast the heat to 82, roll the windows down and use the windshield wipers -- I was on my way.
Did I mention I'm kind of afraid of the high school students? Because I am. I feel like I look young enough to practically be in high school and most of the students are just as tall as me if not taller so I don't even have that advantage to work with. I just feel like they can see right through me and they totally know that I don't have a clue what I'm doing. I know how students treat substitutes and that's why I always said I would never be one, but here I am. I was in the library with the first period class this morning and I was thinking how strange it was that the students seemed bored to tears and could hardly wait for their high school careers to be over and yet I came back to high school voluntarily! How ridiculous is that? It all seems a little backwards to me.
Being a sub really isn't what I signed up for when I decided to get my teaching certificate. It's lacking everything that I value in the teaching profession! You don't get to develop relationships with the students, your impact is minimal, you don't get to see them learn and grow as individuals... I feel awkward and uncomfortable. I'm just here to babysit. Sometimes I got to put in a movie, sometimes I get to pass out a worksheet, that's about it.
Everyday is a new job with a new building, new schedule and a new set of students. I never know if I'm going to get to work. The kids roll their eyes when they walk in and see their teacher is absent. This does not make me feel loved. The job is very unfulfilling. BUT it's a job and in many aspects it's quite an easy job and it pays a lot better than most part-time jobs do. So that's all good, PLUS I have gotten to sub in Tara's cooking class a few times and one day we got to make chocolate chip cookies, so that was really fun AND last week I got to sub for the kids I had last year when I was an intern and it was so much fun to be with them! It made all the difference in my day that I actually knew their names and I was familiar with the school and I know the teacher and he left me proper sub plans and fun, interesting, productive things to do and I know loads of other people who work at the school so I had plenty of people to say hi to. I feel like I belong there. I like to be comfortable. I like for things to be familiar. Basically, I'm just not doing a great job of having a positive attitude... I need to work on it. I usually get to sub 2 days a week, just enough to get me out of the house a bit and put a little money in savings : )
I've also gotten to do quite a bit of babysitting recently, so that's good news. Actually, I really appreciate how much people have been calling me for babysitting jobs. In the past, I used to look at babysitting as if I was doing the parents a favor by giving them time away from the kids but now, I really just feel like they're helping me out. And it's wonderful. I'm also having a lot of fun being at home with Mom and Tara. So that's good too!
The wedding plans are going well. I have my dress (check), location (check), caterer (check), DJ (check). Lots of big things have been taken care of so that's definitely positive.
Sorry for the little complainy session... I just needed to send that out into the void. It made me feel better somehow : )
Thanks for putting up with it!
Steph
Did I mention I'm kind of afraid of the high school students? Because I am. I feel like I look young enough to practically be in high school and most of the students are just as tall as me if not taller so I don't even have that advantage to work with. I just feel like they can see right through me and they totally know that I don't have a clue what I'm doing. I know how students treat substitutes and that's why I always said I would never be one, but here I am. I was in the library with the first period class this morning and I was thinking how strange it was that the students seemed bored to tears and could hardly wait for their high school careers to be over and yet I came back to high school voluntarily! How ridiculous is that? It all seems a little backwards to me.
Being a sub really isn't what I signed up for when I decided to get my teaching certificate. It's lacking everything that I value in the teaching profession! You don't get to develop relationships with the students, your impact is minimal, you don't get to see them learn and grow as individuals... I feel awkward and uncomfortable. I'm just here to babysit. Sometimes I got to put in a movie, sometimes I get to pass out a worksheet, that's about it.
Everyday is a new job with a new building, new schedule and a new set of students. I never know if I'm going to get to work. The kids roll their eyes when they walk in and see their teacher is absent. This does not make me feel loved. The job is very unfulfilling. BUT it's a job and in many aspects it's quite an easy job and it pays a lot better than most part-time jobs do. So that's all good, PLUS I have gotten to sub in Tara's cooking class a few times and one day we got to make chocolate chip cookies, so that was really fun AND last week I got to sub for the kids I had last year when I was an intern and it was so much fun to be with them! It made all the difference in my day that I actually knew their names and I was familiar with the school and I know the teacher and he left me proper sub plans and fun, interesting, productive things to do and I know loads of other people who work at the school so I had plenty of people to say hi to. I feel like I belong there. I like to be comfortable. I like for things to be familiar. Basically, I'm just not doing a great job of having a positive attitude... I need to work on it. I usually get to sub 2 days a week, just enough to get me out of the house a bit and put a little money in savings : )
I've also gotten to do quite a bit of babysitting recently, so that's good news. Actually, I really appreciate how much people have been calling me for babysitting jobs. In the past, I used to look at babysitting as if I was doing the parents a favor by giving them time away from the kids but now, I really just feel like they're helping me out. And it's wonderful. I'm also having a lot of fun being at home with Mom and Tara. So that's good too!
The wedding plans are going well. I have my dress (check), location (check), caterer (check), DJ (check). Lots of big things have been taken care of so that's definitely positive.
Sorry for the little complainy session... I just needed to send that out into the void. It made me feel better somehow : )
Thanks for putting up with it!
Steph