Eleven days into the new year and this is my first post? Hmm... not off to the best start here, am I? Well, actually, I'd say that overall it has been a pretty good start. I began the new year with a full day of cleaning up around the house including taking down and putting away all of the Christmas stuff. Then we had a visit from Chelsea, which passed by far too quickly (highlights: Chelsea and I made pink champagne cookies -- these sound and look better than they taste, would be super cute for a bridal shower though -- and then went into Seattle where we stopped on Queen Anne -- the Tea Cup is closed!! How sad is that? -- then made our way over to Ballard for fried Brussels sprouts at The Walrus and the Carpenter oyster bar -- p.s. we did NOT enjoy the oysters -- and then at Chocolati in Greenwood we shared an Irish cream hot chocolate and two truffles). Steven and I have been watching lots of Psych (we received 4 seasons between our two Christmas stockings) and eating lots of grapefruit. And I have been reading up on how to properly make bouquets and corsages as I have the pleasure of doing the flowers for Tim and Annika's wedding at the end of this month! I love learning new creative things like that. I plan to actually start practicing with real flowers and wire etc. over the upcoming 3 day weekend (woohoo!! so glad to have a 3 day weekend already!) Oh! And I have this fun new 5 year memory book that has a page for each day and a space to write a line or two (I'm not describing this very well). So each night before bed I've been writing down a quick memory or highlight from that day. It will be fun to watch how things change. When I am writing on the page for January 11th in the year 2015 I will be able to read (on that same page) what I wrote January 11th each of the 3 previous years. By the end of the book (in five years) we will have kids (okay, well, at least one) and we'll be in a new home and everything will just be so different.
I also have a few new "good habits" that I'm hoping to pick up this month. I choose not to call them resolutions because the first day you don't do what you've resolved to do you feel like a complete failure, lose all momentum, and give the whole thing up until next year. So far the only one that I've tried and actually been pretty successful with is flossing. I've never been a flosser before but I decided this was the year and I haven't missed a day yet. Here's my question though -- does it ever stop hurting? My poor little gums. It really is a very uncomfortable experience for me. Not my favorite. What's really funny about it though is that when I floss after brushing my teeth before bed it makes Steven feel like he should too and then he grumbles about it the whole time. It makes me laugh.
Other new habits that are on my list but that I haven't really tried sticking to yet:
1. Reading 15 minutes it a day.
2. Writing one letter per week.
3. Visiting the gym once per week -- I'm not actually required to do anything, I just have to show up ;)
4. Praying daily.
5. Typing/journaling for at least a few minutes everyday -- I'm the sort of person who just needs to download.
So there you have it. I definitely have some work to do. I thought maybe posting them on the blog might be somewhat motivational for me. I've prayed a few times in the last eleven days, I've written one letter, I have not made time to journal, I have only spent a scant 7 or 8 minutes reading and I most certainly have not been to the gym even one single time. We just got the membership a couple of weeks ago and I'm feeling all shy about it. It's always weird going somewhere like that for the first time and not knowing where anything is. Or maybe I'm just making excuses :) This is a definite possibility.
In the midst of all of these developing new habits I am also trying to renew my perspective. I think I've been a bit of a downer in recent months, mostly due to my job. I choose not to complain much about my job on the blog because, well, believe me, you just really don't want to read about it (plus if you're someone who gets e-mails and phone calls from me AND reads my blog then that would just get really obnoxious after a while). Plus, also, if I got started, I would probably blog complaints about it everyday. I tend to wallow in my work-related misery more often than I should, this is something I'm trying to change.
I heard two things today that I found rather helpful in starting to make this change. The first: "when someone is pointing out one or two or three things that you're doing wrong, just think of everything else they aren't saying that you must be doing right!" Unfortunately my boss is a bit of a micro-manager, let me rephrase that, the biggest micro-manager ever, and instead of motivating people with constructive, encouraging and helpful thoughts, she chooses to use negative comments that are dripping with condescension. She can always, always find something that I'm doing wrong even if it's something that just the day before she told me to do. Anyhow, with a director like that who chooses hardly ever to acknowledge the many good and wonderful things that you are doing, I think it's okay to point them out for yourself from time to time. It's nice to be reminded that you aren't a total failure, even if you're the one doing the reminding. The second encouraging thing I heard today was the assistant director of our school telling me that she hopes I don't leave because she thinks I've been wonderful for the school and she very much enjoys having me there. I was shocked. She told me I'm doing an excellent job and she would be very sorry if I left. I had no idea! I can't even tell you how good it felt to hear that.
Mostly, I need to remember every single day that I am so fortunate to have a job, especially one that isn't subbing, pays pretty well and goes so nicely with what's important for me to have on my resume for the future. I don't come home from work crying everyday like I did when I was substitute teaching. The children are all pretty sweet and fun to be around. The teachers who I direct are all kind and friendly and helpful and my job really is pretty easy. I just need to keep my head up. It's like I'm just looking down all of the time and only seeing the dirt. You know the dirt is there, you don't have to look at it. There's so much else going on and I suppose if I gave it a chance some of it might even make me smile. On that note... I wore make-up yesterday, which I never do and all day long the kids were saying "You look different Mrs. Lentz," "Mrs. Lentz, you look fancy today," and even a "Who are you?" (seriously? yeah, that student may have gotten a sarcastic response from me for that one). Most of the girls thought I looked pretty, the boys thought I looked different, Hana thought I looked fancy and then there was Emily who wrinkled her nose and asked why I was dressed like the '80s. Who knew that a little eye liner and some mascara = "dressing like the '80s"? Aren't elementary students the best?
So that's my update for the first week or so of the new year. To be quite honest, I'm glad I waited to write. My first day back to work last week I was drafting a blog post in my head that was titled "Just Shoot Me" and I don't think that's any way to start off 2012. This is going to be an exciting year for us and I don't need to make things difficult for myself by being more dramatic about my job than is really necessary.
Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not see it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland. -- Isaiah 43:18-19
Then God said, "Behold I am making all things new." -- Revelations 21:5
You make all things new. Come redeem and come transform. Come renew and restore.
-- Steven Curtis Chapman
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